The Casting Dock

the four year marker.

Four years. Wowza.

In the past four years, we have moved to Virginia, earned our Masters degrees, moved back to Massachusetts, started professional jobs in our fields of choice, and traveled to Mexico, Guatemala, Italy, England, France, Maine (a bazillion times, of course) & Georgia&Texas (obviously) & Maryland & Washington DC & Washington State & Alaska & Hawaii & Florida.

I have learned that:

* we actually are as good at communicating as I thought we were when we were dating. It’s our strongest trait.

* we live really well together in small spaces and both seem to enjoy it.

* while we may not “fight” often, we are good about fighting fair, nipping things in the bud quickly, and being honest when we are guilty of saying things with an edge or agenda.

* we prioritize spending money in the same way. Huge plus. Vacations, time with friends, and gifts for others supersede both of our desires for material things, new gadgets, or nice cars.

* people, once married, really do mesh into one another. We have pulled each other towards the middle in so many areas, closing the gap between our differences, yet still leaving them intact enough to maintain our individuality and to complement one another.

You specifically have taught me what it looks like to truly put someone else first. I know I say it all the time, but when it comes to you and me, you truly are the better person. You set an impeccable example of service and selflessness, putting my needs or quirky little desires before your own. You became better at this when we got married as compared to dating and even better as the years have gone on. I have been most surprised to see this intentionality grow and not fade with familiarity as the years have begun stacking up. This is the area in which you have impressed and surprised me the most.

Second to that is your ability, desire, and clear effort to change or improve in areas that matter to me. No longer the awkward social standby in large gatherings, you make an effort there, engage in the mandatory small talk and even successfully fool people into believing that you’re an extrovert (!!), all because you know it matters to me. That effort is not lost on me. I am so grateful and so impressed by your ability to tangibly improve.

It may take more now than it used to since I know you and your humor so well, but you still can make me laugh like pretty much no one else. I know you take great pleasure in the times when you really get me good. I hope that never changes.

I am most curious to see how our marriage changes when we have kids. I have always known the communication would be good, living styles would be similar, our personalities would mesh well, and our general values would align for finances&faith&family&allthat, but parenting brings in a whole new element. And you know how I think I will be very opinionated. I think it has the greatest potential to be our main area of disagreement and difficulty.

But we’ll figure it out, I’m sure.

Happy Anniversary Jer! I love you. And you’re welcome for these last four years…

7 comments

1 Jer { 08.03.12 at 12:53 pm }

Thanks for the kind words. I could fill a couple blog posts’ worth of space with praise and gratitude for you, but I will spare the masses and keep it simple.

Happy anniversary and I love you, too.

2 erica { 08.03.12 at 5:19 pm }

:) This blog post has got to be my favorite so far! Not going to lie, a few tears came out. You two are in my top 3 favorite couples in the world (and individually, you guys are part of my top list of favorite people as well). I love you- I am so glad I met Josh (and married him), so I could have you guys in my life forever ;)

3 Bryan { 08.04.12 at 10:52 pm }

Wow. This makes for a great post. Really good photos once again! Loved it

4 Noche { 08.05.12 at 12:03 am }

Happy Anniversary Lisa & Jerry!! I love how you both have grown by serving each other. I look forward to seeing the strides you will make once the little tykes arrive…he,he,he. Love from the Noche

5 Mama Logan { 08.06.12 at 7:56 am }

Hope you had a wonderful anniversary weekend! I really can’t believe it has been four years since we all gathered in York Harbor for your beautiful and memorable wedding. My love to both of you as you forge ahead to MANY more years together!

6 Lindsey { 08.17.12 at 10:55 pm }

Beautiful post! You guys are such a great couple. Happy belated Anniversary!

7 Maggy { 08.19.12 at 4:04 am }

This is so well written Lisa! I loved it all. I didn’t really know you as a couple (or, ok, much at all) but I admire you both! Happy new year of marriage, I hope it keeps getting better :)

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