The Casting Dock

Let’s talk sexy.

What do you find sexy?

I think most people would agree that an image of a ridiculously attractive, ridiculously tan, in-shape man with kind eyes, a lovely smile, and a robust head of luscious (perhaps salt-n-pepper, or is that just me?) hair would flash into your head pretty effortlessly. Replace man with woman and tack on a nice pair of breasts and you’ve got the other side of the coin as well. That’s our typical portrayal of sexy, isn’t it? I mean, I can’t disagree. I love me some Brad Pitt and Tom Brady as much as the next girl. Who wouldn’t?

But I was talking with a friend of mine the other day about attraction, masculinity, and “sexiness” and really began thinking, What do I really find sexy? Sure washboard abs, a nice head of dark hair, and a bronze tan are instant attracters, but 30 seconds in to a conversation I could find an obnoxious, self-involved idiot of a person and that attraction would fly right on out the window. So, what are the qualities that I have most frequently found myself attracted to throughout this short little life of mine? What is really and truly sexy to me?


1. Intelligence
2. Athleticism
3. Humor

Confidence tempered with humility is a close fourth, but otherwise, these are my big three: far and away the most attractive male qualities to me. I wish my list was “holier” like “honest, loves God, and compassionate” but that would just be a blatant lie. I mean, I love and appreciate those qualities, but they aren’t crackin’ my Top 3. I know myself well enough to know that, for better or worse, I like smart guys, sporty guys, and witty guys. Luckily for me, I snagged myself one who’s all three (and so much more…[shameless and obnoxious married person plug which I hope caused you to roll your eyes just a little]).

Attraction is such a funny little beast. When my friend and I were having this conversation she said, “I know this sounds silly, but when I think of masculinity, I think of a man wielding an ax.” And I thought to myself, “I think of a ridiculous athlete.” I think we each have our “thing” that we find particularly (and irrationally) attractive which helps us define and categorize masculinity and femininity. Whether it’s actually beneficial or just stereotypical and potentially harmful is another questions entirely, but we all have those pre-judgments and expectations for attraction. Hers is ax-wielding manliness; mine is crazy athletic talent.

What’s yours?

And what would be your Top 3 qualities to define sexiness?

PS. yesterday’s money guessing give-away is open until Thursday morning…check it out.


1 jenna { 04.20.11 at 10:37 am }

salt and pepper. it’s not just you. i couldn’t agree more.
when i was in italy, we coined this the “silver fox.”

2 bryan { 04.20.11 at 9:00 pm }

This is such an interesting topic, Lisa. You are getting pretty bold. The main problem for me is that as I get older it gets harder to keep up with the current sexy magazine gals. Who is considered sexy right now? Megan Fox, ok. I can’t think of anyone else. So I am not totally sure what is the current definition of sexy, as defined by society through the media.

Sexy doesn’t last all that long usually. I know that I am less sexy than I once was. (Some will argue this point, but, come on, there has clearly been some slippage.) When I watched was a big media consumer and watched TV shows, the top models were Cindy Crawford, Elle McPherson, Tyra Banks, Claudia Schiffer, etc. I don’t think any of those women are working as models anymore and it’s only been like 10 or 15 years…

But, just as Tyra Banks has expanded her offerings into television, I too have adapted to compensate for my loss of sexiness. The main tactic I employ is innovating new social trends and slangs. This gives me prestige and status that makes my diminished sexiness unnoticeable.

I use this equation:

Appeal = Sexy + Status

Me, 2002: Sexy = 10, Status = 0; Appeal is 10.
Me, 2011: Sexy = 9.99 Status = 0.01; Appeal still 10.

As you can see, I am still a catch with no quantifiable drop off in market value.

3 noche { 04.20.11 at 11:46 pm }


4 sexy again. it’s like more cowbell. you can never have enough. | The Casting Dock { 04.27.11 at 6:25 am }

[...] our little chat about sexiness the other day? well, try this one on for [...]

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